And the angels woke up...

So...to sum it up...God has been doing some amazing, big things. Shifts are happening. Hearts are turning. Healing is happening. I can finally say, I believe that history is being made today, and I get to be a part of it. You know, I was kinda upset that I wasn't able to go an event that was planned carefully to usher in the next strategic move of the Spirit, and I heard some pretty good things happened, but there weren't any huge angels that sat up from the ground. I was told by someone special that she truly believes that God is waiting for me, He knows how badly I want to see His kingdom come from heaven and to actually see the atmosphere change, and He's waiting for me, He'll allow me to see it happen. I'm so excited. Never have I been so excited to be alive and to be a part of what God is doing. And I can see it! It's what I'm living for. He's worth every breath I have, and every waking moment is lived for Him. GAHHH!!! I love this, I love Him!

So, with that being said, as an update, I'm sure more things are to come. The creativity in me is at an all time high, and He's the one who's inspired me. I'm so excited for this next move to happen and to bring new ideas and creativity to the table! So...look for that...I've already started to do video announcements, I know there's more to come.

Also...I'm keeping this blogger for personal stuff, writing and such, and then I'll be posting most of my creative outlet on here:

http://fergusthebrave.tumblr.com/

But he said to me, "My grace is sufficient for you, for my power is made perfect in weakness." Therefore I will boast all the more gladly about my weaknesses, so that Christ's power may rest on me. That is why, for Christ's sake, I delight in weaknesses, in insults, in hardships, in persecutions, in difficulties. For when I am weak, then I am strong. 

- 2 Corinthians 12:9-10

Get ready guys, something HUGE is not only going to happen, it's already started!

I had lost all dreams of unwritten things

...until this summer...

God gave me a vision of my destiny, of his promise. of my purpose and where my identity lies...

At the end of an awful spring semester, I came to a dead end. It wasn't even a choice of continuing the way I was living or to make a turn around. It was just that I had to change everything that I was doing. I made the choice to seek God with my entire heart and being this summer. I also made a list of things that I wanted him to restore. 

*I asked Him to restore my dreams, to give me a vision and hope for my purpose. 

*I asked to be romanced by Him

*I asked Him to teach me to lean and understand the way that God speaks with me.

*I also asked Him to teach me how to listen, how to spend time with Him. 

*I asked Him to show me ways that I can use the skills and talents that He's given me , to use them for HIs Kingdom

*And I also asked for healing in many areas of my life

I let God do what He needed to do in my life this summer. It hurt just about all the time, but I knew it needed to happen. And now, as the end of summer approaches, I can see every single way He answered me.

*Not only did He restore my dreams, visions, and desires, he multiplied them with more than I could even handle!

*I felt His love in a new way, never before have I experienced this kind of love, and I've found a new joy in my heart. He shows me everyday how much He loves me, and I know that I can't even comprehend it all yet!

*I'm still learning the way He speaks to me, but I'm hearing Him more clearly than ever before.

*I've learned what it means to rest in Him, to spend time with Him and soak in His presence, and it is the most satisfying thing I've ever tasted.

*I was asked at the beginning of the summer to start producing video announcements for the church. I had no experience, and just decided I would give it a try, and it's been a joy and a blessing to be a part of it. 

*Healing. It's a really long process, and takes a lot of time. I know I've seen areas of healing in my life already, but I know that He's not finished yet, and I am perfectly fine with that. He knows what He's doing, and I trust Him, more than anything else in the world.

Transformation is like healing, and it's just as important. The only thing we can do is be humbled and submit ourselves to what God needs to do. I have never felt this way in my entire life. I get up thinking about God. I go to work thinking about God. I do things, thinking about God, looking forward to spending time with Him when I get home. He gave me courage. He encouraged me, loved on me, and became my everything. I have found a love, that lights up every room....and it is so amazing. My eyes are fixed on Him, and will continue to be. He's about to do something really big, something so exciting, and I'm honored to be a part of it. And NO one, not the enemy, not any man, can take that away.

I was born for such a time as this!

Captivated by your beauty

To those who may have forgotten...(<-Click here)

You are a woman. An image bearer of God. The Crown of Creation. You were chosen before time and space, and you are wholly and dearly loved. You are sought after, pursued, romanced, the passionate desire of your Fiance, Jesus. You are dangerous in your beauty and your life-giving power. And you are needed.

As a woman who has been ransomed and redeemed, you can be strong and tender. You speak to the world of God's mercy, mystery, beauty, and his desire for intimate relationship. You are inviting; you can risk being vulberable, offering the weight of your life as well as your need for more because you are safe in God's love. You labor with God to bring forth life–in creativity, in work, in others. Your aching, awakened heart leads you to the feet of Jesus, where you wait on him and wait for him. The eyes of his heart are ever upon you. The King is captivated by your beauty.

–Excerpt from "Captivating" by John & Stasi Eldredge

I've currently been pondering the mystery of the human heart and how I don't understand it. Any thoughts?

I was made for bigger things.

I am made with purpose and was made for bigger things.

"Before I formed you in the womb I knew you, before you were born I set you apart; I appointed you as a prophet to the nations."

Jeremiah 1:5

He reached down from on high and took hold of me; he drew me out of deep waters.

Psalm 18:16

He redeemed us in order that the blessing given to Abraham might come to the Gentiles through Christ Jesus, so that by faith we might receive the promise of the Spirit.

-Galatians 3:14

"For I know the plans I have for you," declares the Lord, "plans to prosper you and not to harm you, plans to give you hope and a future."

-Jeremiah 29:11

Do not let your heart envy sinners, but always be zealous for the fear of the Lord. There is surely a future hope for you, and your hope will not be cut off.

-Proverbs 23:17-18

I am accepted in Christ.

Yet to all who did receive him, to those who believed in his name, he gave the right to become children of God.

-John 1:12

For those who are led by the Spirit of God are the children of God. The Spirit you received brought about your adoption to sonship. And by him we cry, "Abba, Father." The Spirit himself testifies with our spirit that we are God's children.

-Romans 8:14-16

I am secure in Christ.

Now it is God who makes both us and you stand firm in Christ. He anointed us, set his seal of ownership on us, and put his Spirit in our hearts as a deposit, guaranteeing what is to come.

-2 Corinthians 1:21-22

Neither height nor depth, nor anything else in all creation, will be able to separate us from the love of God that is in Christ Jesus our Lord.

-Romans 8:39

I am significant in Christ.

I no longer call you servants, because servants do not know their master's business. Instead, I have called you friends, for everything that I learned from my Father I have made known to you. You did not choose me, but I chose you and appointed you so that you might go and bear fruit-fruit that will last-and so that whatever you ask in my name the father will give you.

-John 16:15-16

Therefore, if anyone is in Christ, the new creation has come: The old has gone, the new is here! All this is from God, who reconciled us to himself through Christ and gave us the ministry of reconciliation: that God was reconciling the world to himself in Christ, not counting people's sins against them. And he has committed to us the message of reconciliation. We are therefore Christ's ambassadors, as though God were making his appeal through us. We implore you on Christ's behalf: Be reconciled to God. 

-2 Corinthians 5:17-20

Now if we are children, we are heirs–heirs of God and co-heirs with Christ, if indeed we share in his sufferings in order that we may also share in his glory.

-Romans 8:17

Jesus IS my Hero

For he has rescued us from the dominion of darkness and brought us into the kingdom of the Son he loves, in whom we have redemption, the forgiveness of sins.

Colossians 1:13-14

"Because they love me," says the Lord, "I will rescue them; I will protect them, for they acknowledge my name. They will call on me, and I will answer them; I will be with them in trouble, I will deliver them and honor them. With long life I will satisfy them and show them my salvation."

Psalm 91:14-16

And you know what? You were made with a purpose and called to bigger and better things. You are accepted, secure and significant in Christ. Know who you are in Christ. Let Jesus be the man who rescues you. You and I are not something to be trifled with. We are sons and daughters of the most high. We need to step up and take our places as he has called us to do and accept that even though we don't deserve it, he gave us the right to become children of God.

We are the redeemed

We are the ones who are free
And we belong to Jesus
We are now alive
And in this world we will shine
We belong to Jesus

Dreams of Unwritten Things

I used to have dreams of unwritten things.

 

of destiny. of promise. of purpose. 

As they slowly withered away, I was unaware. I violently awoke to the realization that they were all gone. I was so blind to the fact that choosing to satisfy my flesh instead of my spirit could expunge them to the point of not remembering what they once were.

With visions of futurity erased, I float fixed in still water. How does one move forward in this stream of hopelessness? How does one really live without hope? I've come to find that you don't. You might go through the motions of life itself, but is that really living?

The realization of this all came about when my pastor started talking about how we're supposedly in a season of favor. He's said this over and over again, "In a time of favor, ask for favor, and the time of favor is now." So I searched my heart for dreams that had become absent, and asked what that really is all about.

I know that my God holds His plans for me in His hands. I know that those plans are to prosper me and not to harm me. I know that they are plans to give me hope and a future....

His plans....are to give me hope and a future. Do I need to know them in order to have hope? In order to have a future? When you're in a season of favor, and are supposed to ask for favor, how do you ask for something when you don't know what you want yourself? 

As I leave and let all things go, I've chosen to go after God this summer. Wholeheartedly. Not half, not a quarter, but with all of my heart. I don't believe that I've ever known what that truly looks like in my life, but I'm hoping to find that out. Hoping. And the only thing that I know to ask God for in this moment is the restoration of my dreams and to replace all the absence with hope. 

Be Thou my Vision, O Lord of my heart;

Naught be all else to me, save that Thou art.

Thou my best Thought, by day or by night,

Waking or sleeping, Thy presence my light.

Be Thou my Wisdom, and Thou my true Word;

I ever with Thee and Thou with me, Lord;

Thou my great Father, I Thy true son;

Thou in me dwelling, and I with Thee one.

Be Thou my battle Shield, Sword for the fight;

Be Thou my Dignity, Thou my Delight;

Thou my soul’s Shelter, Thou my high Tower:

Raise Thou me heavenward, O Power of my power.

Riches I heed not, nor man’s empty praise,

Thou mine Inheritance, now and always:

Thou and Thou only, first in my heart,

High King of Heaven, my Treasure Thou art.

High King of Heaven, my victory won,

May I reach Heaven’s joys, O bright Heaven’s Sun!

Heart of my own heart, whatever befall,

Still be my Vision, O Ruler of all.

Two more weeks...

until I can come home and sleep in my own bed in my own room.

until I can lay about on the Westgates couch as the breeze flows in and out of the screen door while we watch our favorite movie.

until we can take random road trips, to all sorts of beaches with all kinds of people, and I can let the ocean take control of my body.

until my best friend and I can wait for the golden hour, and go about finding new places and random objects to capture in a new way with our other best friends, our cameras.

until my skin will start to turn the color that the winter never sees.

until I have more time to delve into all of the books I've been wanting to read, outside.

until I can wait for the summer nights where there's a thunderstorm, and be comforted as I fall asleep listening to the rain on my window.

until I can really look forward to the hot summer days that can only be cooled down by walking in the creek, eating ice cream, drinking milkshakes and smoothies, or even running in skirts out on my best friends front lawn, in her land lords sprinklers, hoping they won't catch us and think we're nuts.

until I can look forward to late nights, and savor all the sun that I possibly can.

until I am done with my first year at Kutztown. 

Oh, what a summer this will be.